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The Ego
I was at a fast food outlet today and after I gave my order, I stood aside to let other customers place their order. As I normally do when I have nothing better to amuse myself with, I generally looked around the area at the other customers eating.

Waitaminute... what's this?

More than half the men over there had their eyes trained above me. I glanced above my head and saw a TV. Showing a music video. Of a girl with an amazing figure in clothes that looked like they had been stitched onto her skin...black and a plunging neckline. So I looked back at the customer area... Nopes, not one of them had so much as twitched or moved a muscle.

All eyes were above me.

And then ... OMG, they looked away! I glanced up. New music video. Nothing interesting this time apparently, so they all went back to eating.

*sigh*
Labels: 4 ego boost(s) | | edit post
The Ego
Well ... no one called me Aunty. Well, not exactly.
I mean, yeah I'm 21 and I just got my 10 year driver's license (whoopee!), but I am not really old...am I???
This guy calls me to ask about the college I've studied in coz he's considering joining. While talking, he said, "Ma'am can you tell me about -- insert college name here --?"
I started answering but then stopped halfway through and asked, "How old are you?"
"19", he said.
To which I replied, "Well I'm 21, so can you not call me ma'am?"
He said alright.
But then unconsciously while talking later, he called me ma'am again.
Stupid boy.

I'm going to be one of those "Aunty mat kaho na" types... I suspect even when I'm past 30 and 40... haha...
The Ego
I first became acquainted with the Rorschach inkblot test when I studied Psychology in my 11th and 12th grade of school. The idea of using inkblots to figure out what a person is thinking or feeling was fascinating to me. In fact, one of my favourite quotes is "Reality is only just a Rorschach inkblot you know" by Alan Watts.
A bit of trivia, Rorschachs were referred to in Batman Forever when Bruce Wayne sees an inkblot in Nicole Kidman's office and asks why she has a bat inkblot... she concluded he had bats on his brain. Anyhooooo...

It was this picture that led me the thought that photographs/pictures are in themselves kind of Rorschach-y. Different people saw the picture and each focused on different aspects... I'll tell you what they said and what I believe was on their mind.
My dad saw the picture and asked, "Whose house is that?" [property market on his brain]
My mum saw the picture and asked, "Whose house is that?" [home and hearth on her brain]
Kazz saw the picture and asked, "Whose car is that?" [Cars on his brain]
I saw the picture and said, "Ooooh red flowers!" [my obsession with red coming to the mind]
Stained, who clicked the picture, probably thought, "Ooooohhh... photo opportunity!" [Clearly, cameras on his brain]

See what I mean?
The Ego
"It isn't all that great as it's hyped to be...you don't know...you just don't know. Sometimes I close my eyes, lie unmoving and just let it happen because it's expected of me"

She was telling me, in a vulnerable moment, what sex with her husband was like. You could say I was shocked. I mean, I knew that this sort of thing happens with many women all over the world...but...I don't know. It just threw me off balance.
You go through with something just because it's expected of you? How sub-continental an attitude that is. But how often it happens... A friend of mine said that once you marry someone and live in close contact with them, physical things naturally happen. I agree...and this is one way in which it does. Either you really care for that person and start having intimate relations, or you eventually give in to doing it because it's expected of you. Do I blame the man? Yes, but the woman isn't blameless by the way. She needed to tell him what she needed (time and space comes to mind) and he needed to realize that she was surrendering, not participating, which eventually gave the entire experience a bad vibe in her mind and made it something she tried to avoid.

It scared me in a way. What will happen to me if and when I get married? Will I also eventually give in because I have to, or will I do it because I want to? Will I be one of those women who lie down and close my eyes and just wish it would end?

This confession really scared me... that's all I can say.
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